At a time when millions of Americans are fighting for their right to marriage, the makers of popular culture continue to trivialize the institution. Sasha Fierce's "Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)" is surely not the last example of this cultural trend to reduce marriage to a party thrown in honor of overgrown, spoiled brats looking for social status for fear of being old and alone, but it's certainly the most offensive to date. This trend has been developing since the dawn of Hollywood and TV and it is my hope that the economic crisis can put an end to this madness.

If you're unfamiliar with the track you might be asking yourself, "who is Sasha Fierce and why should I give a crap?" Sasha Fierce is Beyoncé Knowles' lame attempt at an alter-ego concept album and you should care because the song is wildly popular. As far as I can tell Sasha Fierce is indistinguishable from Beyoncé Knowles. It's even weaker than Garth Brooks' Chris Gaines character. When you do an alter-ego they're supposed to be ALTER. That means UNLIKE yourself. An alter ego for Beyoncé would be someone who could, oh I don't know, maybe play an instrument or dabble in a different genre. Without really investigating the lyrics too closely, what jumps out at you and what compelled me to write this piece is the chorus: "If you liked it, then you shoulda put a ring on it." I was hoping there was more to the song buried in the slim non-chorus parts and there is, but it's even sadder and more infuriating than the catchy chorus.

The song begins by requesting that all the single ladies in da club put they're hands up. At first I was like, "OK, this isn't too bad. It's about being proud to be single. I can embrace this," but Ms. Fierce soon pulls the rug out from under said single ladies. These proud females were thinking that they're expressing their independence (and probably still do) but in actuality it's a role call designed to shame these unattached lassies. The lyrics make it known that to be single is lesser than to be married. But what is it about being married that has more value? To Sasha Fierce/Beyoncé Knowles it's about having a ring. It's not about love, as we'll soon see as we delve into the lyrics a little more

Throughout the rest of the song Ms. Fierce at once tries to make the man that broke her heart jealous and protest that life would be better in matrimony. Now that the brotha didn't marry her she's going to act like a total slut at the club. She describes her harlotry at length by stating "I'm up on him, he up on me" and "I got gloss on my lips, a man on my hip, Got me tighter in my Dereon jeans." If you follow the link to the jeans you'll see that in all of Sasha's "grief" she was able to plug herself, as Dereon is Knowles' own clothing label. Another testament to her sincerity as to how heartbreaking this all is, surely. Actually, this stop off to make a little extra dough for herself very much reinforces what I'm getting at here: that it is the things themselves that matter not what they represent. More than just the ring, a wedding has become one of those things. A must-have item that is for sale at an exorbitant price, but comes at a much greater cost to what some value as the most important decision one could ever make.

This obsession with things and making marriage one of those prerequisites for any lady of importance goes even further when Sasha sings:

Don't treat me to the things of the world
I'm not that kind of girl
Your love is what I prefer, what I deserve

She claims that she doesn't need material objects that all she really wants is love. This is a common yet still powerful sentiment, however, she's also full of shit as I've already pointed out. But I'll go even further. You can sing "if you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it" and repeat it 18 times and then throw in a line about how all you really wanted was love and expect your audience to buy it. Actually, her audience will buy it and they have and that's the greatest danger here. The song has an admittedly catchy beat. Writing this piece I can't stop humming the tune in my head. Hidden in this danceable tune is an unhealthy message that needs to be put to rest. Let's get back to the lyrics. Upon closer investigation her words are not really about true love at all. Any bit of honesty or heart is tempered by the words "prefer" and "deserve." It's as if Knowles/Fierce wants to reveal that she actually has a soul and isn't just a money hungry pop star bread by overbearing stage parents, but she can't quite do it. How about "need" instead of "prefer"? Or how about "desire" instead of "deserve?" And once again we are lead back to the core issue here. When she says "love," she's really talking about marriage. She's talking about status and what is expected of a woman nearing 30. "Love" is not a preference. Love, be it romantic, filial, or familial is precious, to be respected, and should be earned. "Fuck love, I just want to get married," is really what she's saying. Now she's acting the fool, flexing her youthful vitality by grinding on some strange man because she's afraid to end up, gasp, over 30 and unmarried. Hell, I say, over 30 and unmarried is a hell of a lot better than nearly 40 and divorced.

The song also reinforces that a woman is nothing without a man when Beyoncé's ProTools enhanced voice "sings"

Here's a man that makes me, then takes me
Then delivers me to a destiny, to infinity and beyond
Pull me in your arms, say I'm the one you own
If you don't, you'll be alone
and like a ghost I'll be gone

This is the most telling verse of the song for many reasons. Ignoring the fact that she just quoted Buzz Lightyear from the movie "Toy Story" with her "to infinity and beyond" line, her false bravado illuminates her deepest characters flaws which cut to the core of what's wrong with how many American women see marriage. She can only be delivered to her destiny if she is "owned" by her man. Owned! If I were a suffragette, a feminist, or shit, just a woman with a shred of dignity I'd be outraged. It's one thing to suffer heartbreak and endure loneliness after a break-up, especially one that you thought would end in marriage, but it's another to believe that you are worthless without a man to hold you up. To own you. Maybe this country needs to be more like India or Afghanistan. Maybe we need arranged marriages. It's my belief that history has shown us that it's better to marry for love than for economic or political gain, but maybe we've got it all wrong. It seems like this is what people want. People want to get married because they feel like they deserve a big party in their honor even if they haven't accomplished anything in their lives. People want to get married because there is something wrong with being old and unmarried. Fine, if all you really want is a wedding, not a marriage, and a ring on your finger to signify some sort of importance then let's just have arranged marriages.

This attitude has permeated our culture and is reinforced constantly by all forms of media and nagging old moms for a long time. Just take a look around. Us Weekly and People magazine are always covering the biggest celebrity weddings. There's a even show on TV called "Bridezillas" that I guess is supposed to teach us not to behave like these lunatics, but the fact that women willingly allow themselves to be taped for a show that they know is called "Bridezillas" connotes that they think this is acceptable behavior. "It's my wedding, I'm supposed to go nuts, right?" Worse than television, the biggest culprit of fostering this deplorable attitude is of course the movies. Since the dawn of Hollywood, movies have been banking on ostentatious weddings and telling us that women are nobodies without a man, but things have gotten worse in the last few years. Most recently, the movies "27 Dresses" and "Bride Wars" really take the cake. I haven't even seen the movie "Bride Wars" but the premise itself is enough to make one never want to marry. Two friends who want to get married on the same day at the same venue (the Plaza in New York City) try to sabotage each other's wedding. The premise, as far as I can tell, has absolutely nothing to do with matrimonial bliss and everything to do with having a big wedding that impresses people. During the preview, the line that gets the biggest laugh is when Candice Bergen asks Anne Hathaway and Kate Hudson if "they want to discuss this with the grooms" and they both vapidly respond, "no." Hahahah lololol. OMG, why would a man want anything to do with the wedding? It's not like HE'S getting married too. For you see, it's not about the man, it's not about love, it's not about a life lived together in bliss, it's about the fucking wedding and impressing your friends. It's about the status. This is precisely what Beyoncé crassly protests in her dancetastic chorus of "If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it."

At a time when gays and straights are fighting for their lives for the right to marry, Beyoncé's sentiment is even more offensive. It is infuriating that people can at once take marriage so lightly and yet refuse the right to others. Prop 8 is a farce and the rights of a minority should never be voted on by a majority. If that were the case, then we'd still have slaves and women wouldn't be able to vote. It's just so blaringly obvious. This country needs to grow up. To Beyoncé and many women in this country, marriage is just something you do within the ten years after college. You mess around for a little while, get a job in PR or advertising, get a cute little dog, find a man, go on standard vacations to Mexico or the Caribbean, and then get married. It's just what you do when you get to "that age." It's not that people between 25 and 30 all of a sudden find the person they want to spend the rest of their lives with, it's that they end up marrying the person that they're with at that point in their lives. It's just what you do.

Is there any hope? Indeed there is and it's called the current economic crisis. The current economic crisis is the slap in the face that this country needs for many reasons. Yes, it is going to suck, it sucks for me right now, but Americans need to learn that you can't get everything you want just because you want it. When everything you own is a result of credit, you are eventually going to pay a price for that. The reality of our current economic hardships can hopefully stop people from rushing into marriage. Since so many marriages exist only for the purpose of throwing a lavish wedding, the lack of cash and credit floating around should diminish this trend. When marriage becomes less affordable it will become more meaningful and therefore require more conviction. Yes, marriage is a social construct and all that malarkey, but it's a beautiful one. I don't care if you want to live like Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon, but the unity of two human beings to death exists for a reason. Be it chemical, spiritual, or religious. There's enough evidence to support its existence and importance that it's source is irrelevant. I say shame on you Sasha Fierce/Beyoncé Knowles for once again reinforcing and encouraging American's insane, materialist attitude towards marriage. Please, stop.